The Rant is Back

The sun may not be quite over the yardarm but I needed that beer! Suppose I should be thankful for the owners and staff at Thom’s Market that they took off American Thanksgiving. Were they open I’d be enjoying Maine Root Ginger Beer instead. I will not, however forgive Romeo’s next door for beginning with the Kristmas Krap Muzak at 10:00 this morning; in the words of a neighbour,  “I never thought I’d be thankful for a leaf blower.”

 

SCOTTISH SINGING SENSATION SUSAN BOYLE SUFFERS STRESS

 

Be careful what you wish for, you might actually get it. We live in a world where a professional athlete cannot scratch his crotch without the event becoming a Youtube iPhone posting. There is a decades-old shot of Prince Charles adjusting the gonads which gave rise to Harry and William while he stands beside his polo pony titled “having a ball” and his Father Philip once turned a hose on the paparazzi. Royalty and movie stars may be accustomed to such invasion of privacy but the rest of us are ill-equipped to cope with becoming an overnight sensation. Ask Barack Obama what happens when you decide to innocently go out for donuts. Should we be surprised that Ms. Boyle lacks the skills and thick skin necessary for being catapulted into overnight stardom.

 

Government by Tweet

 

Alberta Premier Ed Stelmach is using popular social media formats to solicit questions from the public as part of a "year-end interview." What next?

 

Some daily wisdom:

 

 

When I meet a man I ask myself, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?'

Rita Rudner

 

 How many words end in 'dous?'

 

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, hazardous.

 

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.

Robert Orben

 

A great many people think they are thinking when they are really rearranging their prejudices.

William James (1842 - 1910)

 

My feature rant, however, is reserved for the fast-food industry and in particular, its invasion of the aisles of grocery store chains. It had never occurred to me to style myself a slow food advocate but I’m getting there. It was when I walked into a brand new Loblaws store in Oakville and saw three aisles of freezer cases containing pre-prepared food and in particular my first glimpse of frozen Kraft Dinner that I freaked and walked straight out. We’ve all  probably seen the commercial in which the cook tosses flour on her face pretending that rice crispy squares are tough to make; why then are their locations that sell them in 30 or more varieties. Can melting butter and marshmallows be that difficult? Alas, matters have only gone down hill since that visit to Loblaws over 2 decades ago. TV dinners and cake mixes are one thing—I’ve never owned or used either; the trend these days is toward heat and serve dinners already finished in store. Take-out from a restaurant differs only in that the buyer actually heats the food before serving it.

 

Convenience is not without its price. In additives to preserve freshness, in added salt, sugar, and fats to bolster flavour, and financial cost. Consider that in buying a packet of potato chips one is paying $60 a pound for those potatoes. Not everyone would want to make their own salad dressings, mayonnaise, mustards, bread, and French fries as I have done but at least that way one knows what went into them. Carrot, celery and cheese sticks may be convenient along with cauliflower and broccoli flowerets but having someone else prepare them adds substantially to the cost. The idea that people will join a 30-car line-up to buy bland, burnt coffee boggles the mind. In Austin, Texas I’m in a Hispanic neighbourhood and it seems burritos, fajitas, and tacos continue the trend. Taco bread comes in 50 slice flats though masa flour is still available. Salsa comes in bottles or plastic pouches, the vegetables come pre-chopped, the meat in bite-sized pieces, and in the cheese aisle 500 feet of packets of grated cheese. Meanwhile it becomes more and more difficult to find the basic staples necessary to cook meals from scratch. The store with the grated cheese barely stocked solid cheese.